Some Assemblance of a Routine

Sorry I haven't been posting as much lately, loyal blog followers. Or, you're welcome. Whichever.

I feel like, even if not a single solitary soul ever reads this blog, I'm writing to my future self. I plan to have this as a reference when I'm in my thirties and looking back. Hello, me! And whoever else is reading, if anyone is. Rachel? Rosebud? ...Aunt Sue? Hi. Anyway I'd like to write more often, but even when I don't, it's all good.

I'm feeling more upbeat. I don't know why! Maybe I've just lost my mind. Last weekend was alright, I worked Saturday, then Sunday I went to an organ concert with my father. It was pretty good, it was a church organist downtown, it felt a lot like a church function. He played a lot of modern pieces with a lot of sustained notes and complex chords and gradual diminuendos and crescendos. The first piece was my favorite, it made all the hair on my back stand on end. I think I was reading the program notes too much and would have enjoyed it more if I'd just listened to the music.

That made me think about organs and churches and music for awhile. Then Dan started playing a new video game (Kingdom Hearts, which is old, but new to him) and that made me want to play Legend of Zelda, Majora's Mask, which I'm doing. It's a great game. Very unique. You relive the same three days in this kingdom, the three final days before the world ends, over and over again. It's gloomy, you're helping all these people in so many great ways, but every three days you start over and everything is erased, nobody knows you or remembers what you did. As a concept it really speaks to me, and also the world is full of life and good stories and really draws you in. It may be, in theory, my favorite Zelda game. As you play it though, you realize the dungeons are very lacking and some game play is just too tedious. I think somebody should re-do this concept, using the newer systems' power, with a longer time span and a bigger world. It would be neat. Too bad I don't know enough about video games to ever be a game designer.

Certain things inspire me. Video games, certain ones, have this way of inspiring me, which is weird since I'm no good at them and I've watched my brothers play a lot more than actually play myself.

Obama spoke tonight. I think it's funny how both sides want to work together and be all bi-partisan, so long as the other side is willing to abandon their principles and go along with whatever they want. "We should work together to do what I say". Neither side will ever reach much of a compromise, we can only hope that doesn't stand in the way of progress.

Not that I care much about politics. As I stood looking at this man, who is now technically our president, I had a hard time connecting that in my brain. I slowly realized that it was because it didn't matter. It makes no difference to me who is president, who is running this country. It has no effect on my life. You may think that's awfully naive of me to say, or simple untrue. But really, my parents have jobs, they would have jobs no matter who was in charge. If they didn't work where they did, they would work somewhere else. We would get by no matter what. Does anything the president do or say really ever effect us? Does the state of the economy effect us? Not so long as we're still working and paying the bills, prices haven't changed much (except in gas, but that has little to do with the economy), and we have no major investments. It doesn't matter to my family who's president, nothing he does or says will have any direct effect on us, nothing that happens in California effects us, or in Florida, in fact, as far as we're concerned the whole world outside of Pennsylvania doesn't exist. People's connection that they feel to the rest of the world, especially with the advent of computers and improved communication, is largely imagined. We have no real connection to the outside world. That's the way it is, that's the nature of reality. We're all these little single-celled organisms, stimulus-response, stimulus-response, we lose our jobs we'll find another, someone we know dies we grieve and we move on, opportunities come and go, and you know what, what happens across the world makes no difference to me, what happens in Washington makes no difference to me, my only responsibility is to myself, my family, and my immediate community, which is the city of Reading and the state of Pennsylvania. The U.S. is nothing but a bunch of people who all happen to be living near each other. Barack is a man in a suit talking at me through the TV screen. He might as well be going on about sewing buttons.

Okay, that's enough ranting for one post. Anyway, as the title of this post suggests, I'm hoping to settle into a routine again. Last week I was only in school two days, and I feel really out of whack. I need to settle back into a system of doing things, and make sure I go to school every day.

This week, I'm meeting with Khai tomorrow (feeling a little more excited about that now than I was just a little while ago), and I've acquired a double-role in school show because of one of the kids who dropped out. It's a small role, but still, more stag-time=win.

Women are interesting. Mmm. Women.

I leave you with that thought.

_Dr. M